Bitterwind
Pirates × Monsters × A-Discworld-like
Sea of Thieves × Monkey Island × Monty Python — but better..? It's ridiculous, like this claim.
Got ham? Read on.
Bitterwind is a serialised literary and audio anthology — short stories of pirates, monsters, demons, and
ne'er-do-wells in a fantastical world of imagination, magic, and the unknown.
And ham. Lots of ham. Seriously.
Readers on Royal Road
What readers are saying
Season 1 of Bitterwind: A Ham-Heavy Stellar Ride!
Season 1 of Bitterwind is a ham-filled and absurd pirate adventure that will keep you guessing on where the story will go next! … Bitterwind's goal is simply to entertain, and it succeeds!
Tasty bites of high sea adventure
Unabashedly fun. These bite-sized salty sea snacks are packed full of action and character.
Read
An Excerpt from Simon And Hank The Ferryman
"Tonight's the night, Hank. I feel it."
"One way or the other," the ferryman replied, stretching a kink out of his back.
In fairness, Hank had shown up at around the 401st attempt. So Simon could understand this grumbling,
night after night. This was Simon's 776th attempt. He had one more left. Else... Purgatory.
"Better hurry," said Hank, "Spotted a small galleon off the coast on my way over."
Simon and Hank turned and, sure enough, there was a galleon anchored in the bay, its lanterns glowing
warm in the night. They watched as a small row boat splashed down. Several sailors heaved heavy oars
rowing the boat toward them and the cave. A single torch cut through the night as the pirates
approached.
Simon sighed, "There's no way."
"Aye, rotten luck."
"Why don't they wait until morning?"
"Beats me. There'd be better light in the day." agreed Hank.
Simon had a thought.
"I can make this work. Yes!"
He became animated. He danced a jig, jumping up and clicking his
spectral heels together.
"Nothing to lose," he muttered to himself, "If I can get them to pick me up and
take me closer... That might be the best chance I've had in ... well 776 nights."
"775."
The ghost looked puzzled.
"You forgot that night you took off."
Simon scowled at Hank.
Listen
Oh? A pirate YouTube channel?
Audio · In development
Audio productions of each Bitterwind tale are in development. Subscribe on YouTube to be first to know when they drop — and maybe, just maybe, the kraken won't get ya.
News
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The origin
Twenty years in the making. Seriously.
Bitterwind started in 2005. Richard and I were 19 and 20 years old, drawing pirate comics in pencil on printer paper — battle scenes, character portraits, dialogue panels with proper speech bubbles. We had the world. We had the characters. We had Captain Spade, Ivo, Rose, Charlie, and the crew of the Mercy Me. We just didn't quite know how to finish anything yet.
Life moved on. The pages sat in a drawer.
Twenty years later, we made it real. Same world. Same characters. Same ham. The time finally caught up with the idea — or the idea finally caught up with us.
You can read about the origin in the comments on Royal Road, where we've been sharing the old artefacts.
Stay in touch
Follow Bitterwind
New tales, audio drops, and dispatches from the high seas.
@yarronlyhams on X & Bluesky · read free on Royal Road · audio on the TKFY YouTube channel.
- 100% Free
100% Free Online
Season 01 is ten tales of pirate adventure. Audio versions are in development. Read now on Royal Road — no sign-up, no cost, no catch.
Physical edition shipping soon. Waitlist to be first.
How do I buy it / support you?
You can join the Waitlist for Bitterwind: Season 01, which will be shipping soon or pick up a copy of our magazine! And of course, telling your fellow sea doggy's is free!
Bitterwind will always be free online. The physical edition is coming — and worth waiting for.